andrehyg, Divine Mercy

Yesterday, I spent a whole day with Rm. Agus. I picked him up at the airport at 8 am, departing from home at 7 am. Later we arrived at the Cathedral at 10 am, attending a wedding mass of Lena and Bobby. After the mass, we directly headed to Taman Anggrek for late lunch because it was already 1.45 pm when we arrived. At 3 pm we went to my house for taking a bath. At 4.30 pm, I and Rm. Agus plus my wife headed to Gran Melia where the wedding reception was held. Stuck in a heavy traffic jam, we arrived at about 6 pm. The party started at 7 pm and finished at about 10 pm.

So, how many hours did I spend a day yesterday with Rm. Agus? 14 hours.

Last weekend, I had two wedding invitations and I attended both of them, both the holy matrimony at church and the reception. One came from my friend and the other was from Frida’s best friend. It happened that both of them chose Salvator church for their Sacrament of Matrimony.

My friend’s wedding on Saturday was very simple. At church, only family and close friends attended. Totally less than 20 people. The decoration was simple, the choir was simple, even the priest’s homily was very short and the whole process of the sacrament took less than an hour.

What I am trying to say here is whoever is ready for a wedding, just go ahead, don’t worry too much about too many things such as finding a church, finding a priest, et cetera. Eventually, friends and family will lend their hands.

Tomorrow early morning, we will see our obstetrician to check my wife’s opening cut in her abdomen post caesarean section. The Caesarean was done three weeks ago.

You may be wondering why we wait until three weeks to see the obstetrician. It’s because he was on leave.

My wife is going to ask the doctor why she is not allowed to do many things including washing her hair, drinking cold water, eating noodles, going upstairs downstairs often, etc. She is curious because she feels that she is fit and those things prohibited don’t make sense.

I have been sunbathing my son for about two weeks. Every morning at 7 am or sometimes a quarter to seven I am ready in front of my house under the sun. We will sunbathe for about half an hour.

His hemoglobin was supplied from his mother when he?s in her womb. Now he has to produce it himself with the help of a substance taken from the sun, I suppose.

So, here I am with my son under the morning sun.

I made a reservation for my baby three days before September 17, 2004 to see our pediatrician but it turned out that my reservation was not registered. The registrar even told me that our number’s 24 and that would be about 9 pm to our turn but shit him, he made a wrong registration on another day.

I called the registrar and he asked us to come without reservation. It’s a common practice for a doctor to reserve several numbers for stand-by patients. So we had to be there at 3 pm which meant I was still working in the office. I could not let my wife go there on foot although the place was not far but she was just two weeks out from hospital and I believed her wound had not completely healed yet. Feeling uncertain but still, I left my office and headed home to drive my wife and my little baby to see our pediatrician.

My baby was ok, weighting 4.8 kgs. Our pediatrician gave him multivitamin and asked us to come back on October 6, 2004 to get two shots: Hepatitis B and B.C.G. He had got his first dose of Hepatitis B the day he was born.

I hope on October 6, 2004 I don’t have to leave office before working hour. By that time, my wife should be strong enough to go there without me accompanying her but of course if I can accompany her and Andrew to see our pediatrician, it will be better.

This morning, a stump from Andrew’s umbilical cord fell off. When my nurse undressed him for bathing, it just fell off. It was dry and black. I immediately put it into a plastic bag and tomorrow morning I will put it in my safe deposit box.

It’s exactly two weeks after his birth. Today’s the sixteenth day of September and he was born on the second. Nothing physical thing left that connects him to his mother, now that his umbilical cord stump falls off.

Do you know how I came up with Andrew Goutama for my son’s name?
I and my wife had difficulty in finding a last name for our son. For first name, we had agreed from the start to use Andrew, similar to my name.

While waiting for my wife to be conscious from operation theatre, I had a chat with my brother in-law. We were talking about names. I told him that since my family name is Goh / Ng / Wu, I needed to use it for my son’s name but I didn’t want it to sound so chinese. His wife interupted our conversation and proposed Goutama for the last name. I agreed because it sounded so right and it carried a meaning inside. Instead of using Prawira or Pratama which I didn’t feel comfortable with.

Anton, my cousin, had suggested me before to use two-word name instead of three words so I didn’t include Ignatius as his baptismal name in his birth certificate.

A thermos is one of many things to prepare to welcome your new baby. It is important for making formula milk. A thermos, along with cans of formula milk, must be available the first day your baby arrives home from hospital.

Tiger of Japan produces a thermos that is capable of boiling water and then keeping its temperature as we desire. Three choices are availabe: 60 Celcius, 90 Celcius and 98 Celcius. Imagine how convenient it is to have ready hot water at 60 C 24-hour for making milk. We don’t need to mix it with cold water. 60 C is the perfect temperature for making milk. For me, simply put 1 spoon of milk into the bottle, pour in 60 cc of 60 Celcius hot water, shake it, wait for 2 minutes and ready to feed my baby.

If we use ordinary thermos for storing boiled water, its temperature is 100 Celcius. For making milk, it is too hot, therefore, cold water is needed to mix it. The problem is we only need 60 cc for milk and mixing hot water and cold water to reach ideal temperature in small amount of water needs special skill and most importanly, it takes time.

Take my advice, prepare all things / facilities that can help you in taking care of your baby. Be they thermos, warmer, steamer, etc.

Deciding whether to undergo caesarean section or normal vaginal delivery is not easy but I have to make a decision. Don’t be too dependent to the obstetrician. Several things to consider include my wife preference related to her mentality ( she is afraid to pain and all in her mind from the start is caesarean section), the size of her stomach, the position of my baby.

Our obstetrician prefered normal vaginal delivery so he applied a medicine called cytotec a day before my wife checked in the hospital. Besides, he also supplied us a tablet of cytotec to be taken half at night and the other half in the morning.

Cytotec (misoprostol) is used for treating ulcers, its intended used but many times is used to induce labor which could be dangerous.



Fortunately, I didn’t use it.

Andrew Goutama, Wednesday, 1 September 2004
Liquid mixed with blood kept dripping from my wife’s vagina and made her underwear wet. It was 10 pm. She was worried and asked me to drive her to the hospital. I was reluctant because I thought it was usual due to vaginal observation by our obstretrician a day before. Anyway, tomorrow morning, we’re scheduled to check in to the hospital for normal vaginal delivery.

We arrived at the hospital at 11 pm and directly went to observation room at second floor. The nurses checked my wife condition and it turned out the the liquid was from her fetal membrane. We’re advised to check in right away. We’re checked in at room 3411 at third floor. At the same time, we also decided to undergo caesarean section and our obstretrician plus pediatric and anaesthetist we had just chosen agreed to schedule it tomorrow morning at 7 am.

At 1 am on 2 September 2004, my wife had contractions. She was so painful that she was moved back to observation room on second floor. There, she stayed for about 1 to 2 hours and later she asked to be moved back to her room because she couldn’t stand a baby’s crying just delivered next to her. Back to our room, she had a more intense contractions, every 5 minutes. It was 3 am, still 4 hours to 7 am. Getting closer to 7 am, she had even more intense contractions, every minute, that she couldn’t stand it, crying and yelling. The hand of clock hanging on the wall seemed so slow.

At 6 am, the nurses asked my wife to be prepared by taking a bath. At 7 am, she was moved to a theater at second floor. I was not allowed to accompany her inside the theater so I just waited outside the door worriedly. I sent short messages to Rm. Agus in Malang and Rm. Yus asking for their prayers. Rm. Agus replied me by saying he would pray for us, so did Rm.Yus.

At 8 am, I was called to a room next to the theater. My newborn baby was there, clean and fresh. He weighted 4320 gr and his height’s 50 cm. All the nurses congratulated me, including the anaesthetist. The anaesthetist told me that everything went smoothly. I was relieved.

An hour later, my wife woke up and we went to our room. This time, I was completely relieved. Thank God that everything went well. I thanked those who had prayed for me and I also sent messages to friends and relatives informing the good news.

I named my son Andrew Goutama. Goutama has its root from Goh (Hokkien) or Ng (Hakka) or Wu (Mandarin).

Naked Andrew

Andrew rightly after birth

Andrew & mom

Andre & Andrew

Andrew Goutama

Frida & Andrew

Andrew Goutama